为什么有些印度男人总会盯着路上的女孩看，就像从来没有见过女孩一样？

Why do a few Indian men stare at the girls walking on the road like they have never seen a girl before?

为什么有些印度男人总会盯着路上的女孩，就像从来没有见过女孩一样？

以下是Quora读者的评论：

Pooja S

Personal experience:

I am a tall girl.

People used to stare and I got used to that.

So much so that I had become blind to people staring (like most girls).

I was a pretty outdoorsy person and travelled in buses, local trains, on foot at weird times and to new places without a care in the world.

Got stared at in buses, on roads, while sitting in autos, trains, ticketing queues of trains, pubs, discs (everywhere? I dunno)

No matter what I wore, who I was with, what I was doing. Got stared at.

If i stared back, some would look away, some didn't.

I eventually got tired of bothering and grew immune to it.

个人经验:

我是一个高个子女孩。

人们过去常常盯着我看，我也习惯了。

以至于我对别人的目光视而不见(就像大多数女孩一样)。

我是一个喜欢户外活动的人，搭乘公共汽车和本地火车，步行，去陌生的地方。

在公共汽车上、公路上、汽车上、火车上、排队买票的队伍里、酒吧里，都被人盯着看个不停。

不管我穿什么，和谁在一起，在做什么，总有人盯着我看。

如果我回视他们，有些人会把目光移开，有些人则不会。

我最终厌倦了，压根不想操这个心，对它产生了免疫力。

译文来源：三泰虎 http://www.santaihu.com/48564.html 译者：Joyceliu

I always used to wonder, what is there to stare?

I wasn't 'that' pretty.

I wore 'proper' clothes, by choice.

My hair wasn't out of place.

As a young girl, I had convinced myself it was because they hadn't seen many tall girls.

Of course, I always called out people when they touched/tried to touch but I didn't have the bandwidth to deal with staring people.

I was living in Mumbai then and frankly things weren't 'that' bad. Only a 'few' people stared/touched and several times other men/women joined in the creeps-bashing when I pointed them out.

我总是在想，有什么可看的？

我也不是那么漂亮。

我可以穿着“适宜的”衣服。

我的发型也没有出错。

作为一个年轻的女孩，我跟我自己说这是因为他们难得见到高个子的女孩。

当然，我总在别人试图碰我的时候喊出声，但是我没有功夫应付那些盯着我的人。

当时我住在孟买，坦率地说，事情并没有那么糟糕。只有“几个”人会盯着/触碰我，有几次当我指责他们时，其他男人/女人也会帮我声讨他们。

Then I moved to Gurgaon.

I am not that outdoorsy anymore.

I loved walking and in my first week there, I thought I will go to a supermarket which I was like a 15-min walk. That one walk opened my eyes.

There were so many cars slowing down by my side while I was walking on the footpath, sometimes honking, sometimes coming to a halt. I was crossing roads and some cars just sped up to me as if to scare me and get a kick out of it.

Ugh creepy.

I never went even to an nearby ATM alone.

Once me and my girlies were returning late from a movie in an auto. And at a signal, we had to stop. It turns out it was near a liquor store. And can you believe this: there were some 10-15 people around the auto and they started tap on the auto. I don't know what the hell it meant but we got out of there asap.

Such rubbish.

然后我搬到了古尔冈。

我不再喜欢户外活动了。

我喜欢步行，在那里的第一周，我想去趟超市，大概需要步行15分钟。那次散步让我大开眼界。

当我走在人行道上的时候，很多车在我身边减速，有的按喇叭，有的干脆停下来。我过马路的时候，有几辆车加速向我开过来，好像是要吓我一跳。

真令人毛骨悚然。

我甚至从来没有独自去过附近的自动取款机。

有一次，我和我的女友们看完电影很晚才坐汽车回来。在红绿灯前，我们停车。那是在某家酒店附近。你能相信吗：有10到15个人围着汽车，他们开始拍打汽车。我不知道那是什么意思，但我们尽快离开了那里。

简直太垃圾了。

Then I got married.

And my husband told me not to wear my low cut top once when we had plans to go around town.

The feminist in me was outraged! How could he! He had no right to tell me what to wear. I fought with him and I wore what I wanted. The neckline wasn't even that deep anyway.

Then we went out and he was fuming on the way. I thought he was still bitter about the fight, so I brought it up again and he told me that he hated creepy guys looking at me.

I was stumped. "What guys?", I asked him.

"The ones we crossed on the road", he told me.

I never noticed any and I told him so.

"Are you blind?", said he.

I was. I never noticed anyone staring. I used to just look past everyone by default. Now I don't and it makes me realize that in this case 'Oblivion is bliss'

And that is why I have asked my husband to refrain from getting into arguments over this or staring back at such creeps because it is just not worth it. Especially because it won't make any real difference to their psyche. And moreover these days we hardly go ever use public transport or such places or may be because I have again grown blind, no one seems to bother me.

接着我结婚了。

有一次我们打算去城里转转时，我丈夫让我不要穿低胸上衣。

我内心的女权主义被激怒了!他怎么能这么说!他没有权利告诉我该穿什么。我和他吵了一架，我想穿什么就穿什么。领口也并没那么低。

然后我们出门了，路上他气呼呼的。我以为他还在为吵架的事耿耿于怀，所以我又提起这件事，他告诉我他讨厌那些恶心的家伙盯着我看。

我被噎住了。“什么人?”我问他。

“我们在路上遇到过的那些”，他告诉我。

我告诉他，我从来没注意到过。

“你瞎了吗?”他说。

我之前确实是。我从没留意到有人盯着我看。我过去总是默认地扫视所有人。现在我不知道了，这让我意识到在这种情况下“被遗忘是一种幸福”

这就是为什么我要求我的丈夫不要为此争论，也不要盯着这些小人看的原因，因为这样做真的很不值得。尤其是这也不会对他们的心理产生任何真正的影响。而且，现在我们很少乘坐公共交通，可能是因为我又瞎了，似乎没有人打扰我了。

I asked him this same question that you are asking here and he told me the following:

"Most guys are frustrated."

That's all.

The society of India and it's machinery only fuels this frustration.

1.Sometimes, ironically, by withholding everyone within it's 'traditional' (post-wedding) shackles.

2.Sometimes, by justifying crime against women, as just being men being men.

Where does this frustration channelizes?

Assaults?

Rapes?

Gang rapes?

Gro in a crowd?

Eve-teasing?

Staring?

Staring at women in movies and women in real life.

Is it a surprise then that a recent UN sponsored study found the following:

我问了他你在这里提问的这个问题，他告诉我：

“大多数男人都郁郁不得志。”

这就是原因。

印度社会和机制只会加剧这种挫折感。

1.讽刺的是，有时会把每个人都禁锢在“传统的”(婚后)枷锁中。

2.有时，会为针对女性的犯罪辩护，就好比男人就是男人。

这种挫折感如何传导？

袭击?

强奸?

轮奸?

咸猪手?

黄段子?

盯着看?

盯着电影里的女人和现实生活中的女人。

最近一项由联合国发起的研究发现了以下情况，是否令人惊讶?

Indian films topped the chart in sexualised portrayal of women onscreen. The study also states that 35% of female characters in Indian movies are shown with some nudity, the study reports. That's not all. The study found that female characters in Indian cinema make up less than one-quarter of all speaking roles! This isn't the first time stereoty and sexualisation of women in Indian cinema have been talked about; however, the fact that it has ranked so high on an international survey has come as a surprise.

印度电影在屏幕上对女性的性感镜头位居榜首。研究还指出，印度电影中35%的女性角色都有裸露镜头。这还不是全部。研究发现，印度电影中的女性角色不到所有有台词的角色的四分之一!这并不是第一次在印度电影中谈论女性的刻板印象和色情化；但在一项国际调查中排名如此之高的事实令人惊讶。

Ranjith Kumar, I am an Indian

This answer was written when the question did not mention "few" and threw a blanket statement that "Indian men stare...".

One can say 'Indian men stare at girls' only if:

Only Indian men and men in no other country stare at girls

2.All Indian men (implies 100% of Indian men that you come across) stare at girls.

Tell me that at least one of the 2 statements made above are true and only then can you go about generalizing that "Indian men stare at girls". It's really irritating to hear it time and again that "Indian men" are like this or like that.

Do you know how girls who come from other countries to study in India feel safer here than in their home-countries?

Are you so sure that this 'staring' issue is present only in India and nowhere else?

When you raise such a question on a public forum like Quora, you malign the character of all Indian men. So you need to take caution while framing the question.

这个问题没有提到“少数人”，而是笼统地说“印度男人盯着……”。

只有在以下情况下才能说“印度男人盯着女孩看”：

1.只有印度男人盯着女孩看或者其他国家的男人都不会盯着女孩看。

2.所有的印度男人(意味着你遇到的100%的印度男人)都盯着女孩看。

告诉我，以上两种说法中至少有一种是正确的，只有这样你才能以一概全地说“印度男人盯着女孩看”。没完没了的“印度男人”这样那样的说法，真的很让人恼火。

你知道从其他国家来印度学习的女孩在印度比在自己的祖国更安全吗?

你确定这种“盯着看”的问题只存在于印度，而不存在于其他地方吗?

当你在Quora这样的公共论坛上提出这样的问题时，你就是在诋毁所有印度男人的人格。所以你在提问题的时候务必要谨慎。

P.S: The reply might seem harsh but please understand that generalizing such negative things to all the men is truly not acceptable.

P.P.S: While the question earlier did not have the word "most" mentioned in it, it was just a few days back that the question was edited to "Why do most Indian men stare at......". Does it reduce the blame that you thrust upon the Indian men by including the word 'most'? I doubt. Say a girl is walking on a street which has say 100 men. Well, if more than half of them 'stare' at girl, then you have every right to say "most Indian men stare at girls".

Dont get me wrong. I am not trying to downplay the issue. Such men do exst who make girls uncomfortable by catcalling, eve-teasing etc. Such idiots need to be taken to task. What I want to say is that this issue is not endemic to India. And again, not most of the Indian men are like that.

The question should have rather been "Why do some men stare at girls walking on the road like they have never seen a girl before?" Why do you drag 'India' into the question?

P.S.：这个回答可能有点尖刻，但请理解，把这些负面的事情一概而论是绝对不能接受的。

P.P.S.：虽然之前的问题中没有提到“大多数”这个词，但就在几天前，这个问题被修改成了“为什么大多数印度男人盯着……”。你把“大多数”这个词加进去，就能减轻你对印度人的指责？对此我表示怀疑。假设一个女孩走在一条有100个男人的街上。好吧，如果超过一半的人盯着女孩看，那么你完全有权利说“大多数印度男人盯着女孩看”。

别误会我的意思。我并不是要淡化这个问题。这样的男人确实存在，他们通过嘘声、讲荤话等方式让女孩感到不舒服。这样的白痴应该受到惩罚。我想说的是，这个问题不是印度特有的。再说一次，不是所有的印度男人都是这样的。

问题应该是“为什么有些男人盯着走在路上的女孩，好像他们从来没有见过女孩一样?”为什么要把“印度”扯进来?

Subham Dutta, I observe humans :3

We are a large proportion of Indians. We can and will stare at you to your death for our reasons.

FYI, the reasons vary:

(1). You're wearing a short skirt or a super-tight jeans. We can't help, you see. You're 'asking for it'.

In this matter, we can be anyone.We can be almost every random guy person on the street.

We can be those uncles in your locality whom you've seen right from your childhood, whose 'view' towards you suddenly changed the day you hit puberty.

We can be those aunties.We think it's okay to show our unproportionate belly because we are wearing something traditional; saree, for instance.We will give you that 'cover your legs' look!

我们中大部分都是印度人。为了我们的理由，我们可以而且会一直盯着你。

仅供参考，盯着人看的原因各不相同：

(1)你们穿着短裙或超级紧身的牛仔裤。我们无法控制。你们这是自找的。

在这件事上，我们可以是任何人。我们可以是大街上随便一个男人。

我们可能是你们当地的那些大叔，你们从小就见过他们，他们对你们的“看法”在你们进入青春期的那一天突然改变了。

我们可能是那些阿姨。我们认为露出小腹没什么，因为我们穿的是传统服装，例如纱丽。我们会给你一个“遮住你的大腿”的眼神!

(2). Enjoying the hell out of your poor bra strap that may have become visible through your dress by any fortunate chance.Your bra didn't sign up for this life,we know.

(3). Exactly what your ugly boyfriend did to get you in the first place?

(4). Your food.

Besides this, we can be those perverted perverts who doesn't even stop at staring.We will record your legs or that tiny part of your cleavage on our phone while pretending to do some serious stuff on it.We upload it to porn sites though,if you're asking.

This is not about supporting those pseudo-feminists. It is nothing wrong for a girl in India to wear whatever she wants. It's just that a vast majority of my country people aren't ready to grow a pair or grow a mindset that accepts this

(2)你可怜的胸罩带可能会透过裙子露出来。。

(3)你那丑陋的男朋友到底做了什么才把你弄到手的?

(4)你的食物。

除此之外，我们可能是那些变态的变态者，他们甚至会不停地盯着人看。我们会用手机拍下你的腿或一小片乳沟。如果你想问为什么的话，我们会把它上传到色情网站。

我这么说不是为了支持那些伪女权主义者。在印度，女孩想穿什么就穿什么，并没有什么不对。只是我们国家的绝大多数人还没有培养出接受这一点的心态。

Ashutosh, lives in India

I have the answer. It might sound a bit naive.

Why do few Indian men stare at the girls walking on the road like they’ve never seen a girl before?

Because no one’s stop them.

Their parents never told them not to. They hold conservative beliefs that all women should dress modestly. They know that in this society, Men dominate Women. No women would dare stop them. And the men wouldn’t bother.

They falsely believe that women wear certain clothes for them to see, and not because she’s doing it for herself as she feels comfortable and trendy in it.

Some men continue staring at women, even when the woman makes it visibly clear that’s it uncomfortable because they just want a few more seconds to stare at her body.

These are men who believe it’s okay for guys to wear anything. But a woman shouldn’t. There’s patriarchal control over women, and then there’s a lack of respect especially for women who don’t wear what they want her to.

It’s a cultural disaster.

They aren’t capable of putting themselves in her shoes and acting likewise.

对此我有答案。这也许听起来有点天真。

为什么有些印度男人盯着路上的女孩，就像他们从来没有见过女孩一样?

因为没人阻止他们。

他们的父母从来没有告诉他们不要这么做。他们保守地认为所有的女人都应该穿着得体。他们知道在这个社会里，男人支配着女人。没有女人敢反抗他们。男人们也不愿为此操心。

他们错误地认为女人穿某些衣服是为了让他们看到，而不是为了她们自己，不是因为她们觉得这么穿非常舒适和时髦。

有些男人会继续盯着女人看，甚至当女人很明显地表示出他们的目光令人不舒服的时候，依然还是如此，因为他们只是想再多看几秒钟她的身体。

这些男人认为男人什么都可以穿。但女人不应该。印度社会存在着男权对女性的控制，以及对女性的不尊重，尤其是对那些不穿自己想穿的衣服的女性。

这是一场文化灾难。

他们不能设身处地为女性着想，当然也不可能这么做了。

Priyanka Snell, MBA, M.S.(Statistics)

I really have no idea and I've never been able to figure this out.

I just thought about this some time ago. A few months ago, at my previous company (not in India), I was in a meeting where a woman’s loose top seemed to have slipped a bit too low and part of her bra was clearly visible.

We were the only two women in a conference room filled with non-Indian men. Not even one man looked at her twice or made her feel weird about it.

I ed her and told her to set her top right and then it was all okay. But really - nobody made a big deal of it.

When I got out of the meeting, I thought about what would have happened if we were in India. People would've gossiped about it for days.

I remember when I was studying in India and we had this lady professor who was once wearing a t-shirt with a zip in the front. The zip had somehow opened up a little and a bit of her cleavage had become visible. It was a “"talking point” for guys in my class for months.

I honestly do not know what makes people in our country think this way. They have all the freedom that they'd otherwise have in another country - so I'm honestly clueless.

我真的不知道，我从来没弄明白过。

我前段刚刚想过这个问题。几个月前，在我之前的公司(不在印度)，我参加了一个会议，一位女士的宽松上衣似乎滑落得太低了，让胸罩的一角露了出来。

我们是会议室里仅有的两名女性，而会议室里坐满了非印度裔男性。没有一个男人多看她两眼，或者做了什么让她感到不自在。

我给她打了个电话，告诉她把上衣拉好，然后就没事了。但实际就是，没有人对此大惊小怪。

当我离开会议时，我就在想如果我们当是在印度，会发生什么呢。人们会八卦好几天吧。

我记得我在印度上学的时候，有一位女教授曾经穿着一件前面有拉链的t恤。拉链不知怎么开了一点，露出了乳沟。几个月内一直都是我们班男生的“谈资”。

说实话，我不知道是什么让我们国家的人这么想。他们拥有其他国家所拥有的所有自由——所以我真的很摸不着头绪。

Bhuvana Rameshwar, Relationships nuances

Some men are born creeps. They do this for the instant gratification it gives them. They are worse in crowded buses where they do everthing except slee on you. How often we hear women screaming in bad words at an unknown man in crowded trains and buses in peak hours. Some men come at that time only for physical satisfaction from unknown women flesh.

Staring at women or girls if given a chance is another time pass. This oggling is to strip you mentally. It is a kind of male chauvanist behaviour to make you feel so uncomfortable that you will hide in your house forever. This is a dominant bullying behaviour of the uncultured male species. They cannot tolerate women coming out as equal as men.

Once I was in the orthodox city of Madurai, way back in late 80s. I was in the railway station, Madurai junction, standing in a normal queue to book my Chennai ticket (Madras those days).

As I stood I felt somebody was staring at me. I looked to see an oldman in dhoti and a dirty shirt, standing next to a huge granite pillar of the entrance hall. Since he was only an old man, I thought he was harmless and looked his direction once again after sometime as the queue moved . As I looked at him he signalled with his hands “come to me”. He looked old enough to be my grandfather. That's the dark side of the world for you.

有些人天生就是怪胎。他们这么做就是为了得到即时的满足。在拥挤的公交车上，除了睡在你身上，他们什么都干，更糟糕。在高峰时段拥挤的火车和公共汽车上，我们经常听到女人对着一个不认识的男人破口大骂。有些男人在那个时候只是为了从陌生女人身上获得生理上的满足。

如果有机会，盯着女人或女孩看则是另一种消磨时间的方式。这是在精神上扒掉你的衣物。这是一种大男子主义的行为，让你觉得很不舒服，让你想要永远躲在家里。这是未开化的雄性物种恃强凌弱的行为。他们不能接受男女平等。

80年代末，我曾去过东正教徒城市马杜赖。我在马都来火车站，站在一个普通的队伍里购买去往金奈的车票。

我正站着，就觉得有人在盯着我看。我看到了一个穿着脏衬衫的老人站在门厅一根巨大的花岗岩柱子旁边。鉴于他只是一个老人，我认为他没有恶意，过了一段时间，当队伍移动时，我又看了看他的方向。当我看到他时，他用手势示意“到我这儿来”。他看上去老得可以做我的祖父了。这就是这个世界的阴暗面。

Anonymous

Me and my friends are one of those 'Indian men who stare at women'.

Here's something interesting I recently read which is related to this topic.

Broadway is one of USA's most fashionable street. Everyday, thousands of beautiful women walk on this street.

Even 250 years ago the situation was the same. Beautiful women used to walk in their long frocks.

Back in those days there were no good roads in USA. Every time it rained, puddles used to be formed on the street. In order to avoid soiling their pretty frocks, these fashionable ladies used to lift their frocks by an inch, while crossing those puddles, thereby exposing their ankles for a second.

我和我的朋友就是那种“盯着女人看的印度男人”。

这是我最近读到的一些与这个话题相关的有趣内容。

百老汇是美国最时尚的街道之一。每天，成千上万的美女走在这条街上。

即使在250年前，情况也是如此。漂亮的女人过去常常穿着长连衣裙出门。

那时候美国没有什么好公路。每当下雨时，街上就会形成水坑。为了不弄脏她们漂亮的连衣裙，这些时髦的女士们常常把连衣裙提起一英寸，跨过那些水坑，这样她们的脚踝就会短暂地露出来。

Now here's the fun part - American men used to gather around puddles just to get a glimpse of their ankles.

Men will be men.

有趣的是，美国男人过去常常聚集在水坑周围，就为了看一眼她们的脚踝。

男人就是男人。

Ashok Ramesh, lives in India

I believe it is because the way Indians raised. In India talking about sex is a big taboo. Sex education is considered offensive. In classroom, boys and girls are not allowed to sit together. Parents are very protective towards girl child. Marriage should be arranged by parents. Dating is still not acceptable here. Prostitution is illegal. Recently government added oil to the fire by banning porn.

All these things jointly made guys a bit lonely. Same applies for girls too, but girls do have advantage. They can easily find a partner, which is not always the case with guys. This may be the reason why guys stare at beautiful girls or girls in certain cloths.

I am not saying, staring is right. It is wrong, offensive and downright as they don’t do anything other than staring, one should ignore and move on.

我相信这是因为印度人的成长环境使然。在印度，谈论性是一大禁忌。性教育被认为是无礼的。在教室里，男孩和女孩不许坐在一起。父母对女孩非常爱护。婚姻应该由父母包办。约会仍然是不被世人接受。卖淫是非法的。最近，政府禁止色情片，火上浇油。

所有这些让男人感到有点孤独。女孩也一样，但女孩确实有优势。她们可以很容易地找到伴侣，但对男性来说并不总是这样。这可能就是为什么男生会盯着漂亮的女生看，或者盯着穿某些衣服的女生看的原因。

我并不是说盯着人看是对的。这种行为是错的，无礼的，不过他们除了盯着你看外什么也没做，你应该忽略他们，继续走开就是了。

Lingeshwaran, studies Economics at Loyola College, Chennai,Tamil Nadu

Well most of us stare at women,I have come across a lot of men,whom I thought never had such intentions for women do stare at them like they have never seen one.

To be honest,even I sometimes stare at women,because I want to…..;-D

Look,And I don't stare at every women who are walking on road but I watch only the ones who drags my attention.And guys,I look at them,because I admire their beauty.

First I thought, what I was doing was wrong but later I figured that I don't see them the way the other men do,like with all such corrupted thoughts running through in their minds,intimating intentions and so.Whereas me on the other side,I just admire their beauty.

You see,I perceive myself as an artist,who loves art,an mere admirer who commends the god's beautiful creations.

And come on girls,admit,confess cause even women checks on men nowadays.I literally didn't know that women do these kind a things,I got to know that when started I receiving such attention;-p

So…..yes, I wanted to mention this because,not every men sees women the way this society thinks.

我们大多数人都盯着女人看，我遇到过很多男人，我以为他们对女人绝对没有过这样的意图，但他们确实也会盯着女人看，就像他们从来没有见过女人一样。

老实说，我有时也会盯着女人看，因为我想看。

我不会盯着每一个在路上走的女人，我只会盯着那些吸引我注意力的女人。至于男人们，我也会看他们，因为我也会欣赏他们的美。

一开始我认为我错了，但后来我发现我并不像其他人那样看待他们，不像他们的脑子里只有下三滥的想法。另一方面，我只是欣赏他们的美丽。

你看，我认为自己是一个艺术家，一个热爱艺术的人，一个赞美上帝创造了美的纯粹的崇拜者。

来吧，女孩们，承认吧，坦白吧，因为现在连女人也会审视男人。我之前真的不知道女人也会这样做。

所以……是的，我提到这个，是因为不是每个男人都以这个社会的方式看待女人。